Whether you are a singer, performer, athlete, speaker, or basically anything else -- we all can get something from being more confident.
Confidence;
a feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities
So many people I encounter feel that it’s not good to be confident: it’s prideful or egocentric, they won’t be well liked, or that they will be intimidating. They feel like it’s selfish to pour into their giftings --- OR they feel that they will be confident when or if they improve in whatever they are working towards. “I’ll be confident when _______ (I lose 10 pounds, I can hit a High E, I can run a 12 minute mile... etc etc). The list goes on. It’s important to know that confidence is different than pride --- and it’s a very important thing to work on, grow in and will benefit you in so many ways: interpersonally, inwardly, careerwise, spiritually, even physically. Confidence is an essential part of growing in so many different ways!
Studies show that people who are more confident live longer, and are generally healthier. Confident people also tend to be more successful, hold attention longer, have better memories, and stronger relationships.
So.. how do we become more self assured? I believe it is a practice in itself. As you go about your day you can actually try new things in order to slowly build the confidence ‘muscle’ inside of you. It’s not developed overnight, but you can take a few steps every day that will allow you to develop your confidence, and in a way that will stick!
Set Goals and Plans to Work Toward Them
I believe setting goals and actively working towards them can have an enormous effect on your self worth and self esteem. Nothing breaks our confidence like being lazy and sitting around. Studies show that going throughout your day completing tasks and getting things done will trigger a signal in your brain of the feel good emotion. Even something as simple as making your bed in the morning will trigger your brain as one task completed, and encourage you to do another bigger task It’s a chain reaction ..... . Start by managing the small ones, and then move towards bigger goals!
Ask yourself: What is your goal for this week? What are your practical steps for completing that goal? Write it down. Be intentional about it!
Don’t Compare
You’re on a different journey than everyone else. Stay in your own lane! Work as hard as you can -- and don’t spend time worrying about where other people are at. This is simply a waste of brain space, and will only bring you down! Quite frankly I think that comparison is like filling your brain with junk! Be your own best, and try not to spend too much time on social media watching other people’s highlight reels! Chances are they are sitting watching yours too!
Reflect on Your Highest Values
When we start to build our confidence on things that aren’t truly important in the long run, we build a very shaky confidence on a foundation that can easily be swayed. Build your confidence on things that are truly important to you. Whether that be your desire to help the world in some sort of way, your desire to have a positive attitude, prioritize interpersonal relationships, giving back, etc. If your values are built around people affirming you, instagram, or the surface level of your success (ex. An award -- and not your why behind that award) those things can quickly be taken from you, leaving you feeling not-so-great- but if you are reflecting on what is truly important to you - you will not need constant affirmation from the world.
Reflect on your 3 highest values a few times throughout the day.
Be Grateful!
People who take note of things in their life that they are thankful for tend to be more positive. This is a chain reaction; positive emotions produce more positive emotions. Negative emotions do the same thing. Being more positive about your life, and where you are at now, will allow you to exude more inner and outer confidence and feel great!
Surround Yourself With Champions.
We become like the 5 people we spend the most time with. Spend time with people who you would be comfortable and excited about becoming more like! Have people around you that inspire you: You will feel better around them, and also start to develop more of their positive traits in yourself.
Now for one of the easiest and most effective tips......
Change Your Posture!
I stole this one from one of my favourite motivational speakers, Tony Robbins. Your emotional state will respond to your physical state. When you walk a little faster, stand a little taller, and hold your head a little higher - you will instantly feel a boost!
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